Believing We Deserve Better - Desperately Seeking Self Podcast

“I often talked about how I would carry my backpack of shame,” says Michelle Anhang, BA, PCC, CPCC, and Certified Life Coach. Michelle coaches individuals and families living with mental health challenges and moving forward after loss; she is also a motivational speaker who shares her story navigating stigma and shame after becoming widowed at age 34 when her husband died by suicide. In this episode of Desperately Seeking Self, Michelle shares what it was like to hide the fact of her husband’s suicide for ten years, and what it finally took to realize that she deserves more from her life than shame and guilt. 

As a single mother, Michelle didn’t believe that finding her own joy was part of her life. She tells Brooke: “I felt like my life wasn't supposed to be about what I want. It was really about how I’m taking care of everyone else, and filing whatever their voids are.” But after forty-five years of working a job she hated, struggling through toxic and emotionally abusive relationships that didn’t serve her, and refusing to look at the ways she was perpetuating her own pain, Michelle finally broke open. She went to tons of therapy to help her end the cycle of trauma, and now she helps other people suffering from mental illness, grief, trauma, and shame find their way out of the hole and into the light. 

Michelle’s message for listeners? Even if you don’t know what it’s going to look like, invest in fixing yourself. Acknowledging your own power, and refusing to accept toxicity in your life, is the first step. 

Quotes:

“I felt like my life wasn't supposed to be about what I want. It was really about how I’m taking care of everyone else, and filing whatever their voids are.” (10:53-11:04)“I can fix me. I don’t know what it’s going to look like, but I know I have the power to do it.” (14:10-14:18)“I can take whatever comes my way, because I’m choosing not to accept toxicity anymore.” (36:30-36:38)